If you’re anything like me, you probably spent a lot of time as a young person asking this question, wondering when and where you’d meet “the one”. Growing up in the church and our relationally romanticized pop-culture, my entire life system guided me in the belief that if I was faithful and patient, God would one day bless me with someone He made special just for me. This woman would possess every trait that I have ever prayed for. She would be a perfect match for me, understand me better than anyone, and of course fulfill my sexual desires. This person would be my other half, my “soul-mate” that God destined me to be with from the beginning.
The problem with many relationships is people stop being intrigued by who the other is. We become complacent in our relationships and stop our curiosity towards who they are and who they are becoming. It is only possible to inquire of someone else, what you have learned to inquire about yourself. Thus, the deeper you go on your interior journey, the deeper you will be allowed to search and seek for another. Do the hard, humbling, and honest work of self-reflection.